Surviving

"For a while... I can't actually remember when I started feeling so strongly... but when I decided that was how I felt, there was no going back." Zachary replied, "It'll be a surprise when I propose though, no hints and the more you ask the longer it will take me to do it!" He chuckled, reaching over to pet Mika, who was fast asleep. He then looked around the apartment and sighed a little, "I was wondering though, would you like to move to my place?"

Anissa's giggles drew silent, and she leaned heavily against him. "It's been difficult to adjust without Vicky here. I feel like it's making it harder to heal properly. I don't want to leave, but at the same time... I may as well. I've tripped on the stairs more than a few times already... who knows when I'd actually fall down them?" She had a feeling that Zachary's place wouldn't feel nearly as empty, either. Victoria had never lived there, after all.

Zachary was pacing the room with his arms crossed over his chest. He had been waiting for this day to come for almost three months and now that he was looking at only seconds, he was nervous. He wanted to get it right, not only because he wanted her to say yes, he knew she would, but he also wanted to make sure she could understand him without being able to see. The ring he held in his hand was dainty, it was beautiful and intricate. Several little diamonds were clustered at the band, with one large one in the center. He'd gone to Michael for proposal advice, but his friend just shrugged and told him to get creative.

Getting creative was hard, and he had to be extra creative with a girlfriend who was blind. It had been a couple of months since the two of them had relocated to his apartment. It was on the first floor and Anissa didn't have to worry about stairs there.
He sighed heavily and took another look at the ring, trying to think of what he should do. Suddenly he heard the doorknob jiggle and in stepped Olivia and Anissa. Olivia was the friend he'd wanted to introduce her to a long time ago, but hadn't gotten around to it until just before they moved.

"I had a lot of fun!" Olivia smiled, "I'll see you later! Bye Zach!" She called.

"B-Bye!" He waved to Olivia and the redheaded girl left.

"Anissa..." He smiled, "Can I talk to you?" He asked, taking her hand and leading her over to her favorite chair to sit down.

"Of course." She smiled, and after removing Mika's harness and setting it on its stand, she allowed him to guide her to her favorite chair where she was able to settle comfortably in its cushions. There were days where she wished her sight would come back in a sudden way, and today was one of those days. She wanted to see Zachary's face again, and not simply feel it with the tips of her fingers. She had always loved his beautiful eyes... the breadth of his shoulders, and now she had to rely on fading memories to remember how he looked. "Please don't tell me you broke my coffee mug. I'll have to hug you and forgive you, and make sure you don't feel too bad about it if that's the case."

Zachary chuckled, "No, it's nothing like that..." He leaned over and kissed her gently upon her lips and then caressed her cheek, "I was thinking about this for a while... and I thought of all kinds of ways I could go about doing this, but in the end I just decided that it was easier to just talk, not that I don't want to be elaborate or extravagant, but to me it doesn't matter, as long as I say the right things. I want to start by telling you how much you mean to me... that you've become my other half... the one I look forward to waking up to every morning. I want you to know how crazy I am for you, that I can't imagine my life without you at this point. I want... I want you to be in my life for the rest of it, for as long as we live. So Anissa Vasnev... will you marry me?" He pressed the ring gently into the palm of her hand, anticipating her reaction to feeling it.

Anissa's jaw dropped, and she clasped her hand over the ring, as if refusing to ever let him take back. She held the hand to her chest, feeling of ring's design as her brain searched for the proper words to express her excitement. There weren't any... none that were even close to the magnitude of the 'yes' that she wished she could scream. Tears welled in her eyes, and she wiped at them with her free hands while nodding quickly. "Y-Yes!" She cried, her face contorting from the pain of holding back sobs that were threatening her. She really hadn't expected his proposal to be so soon. "It feels so beautiful, Zach! I love it! I'll never take it off! Not ever! Put it on!" She finally held her hand out with the ring laying in it. "I love you so much! Oh, yes! I'll definitely marry you! I'm so blessed. So, so blessed."

Zachary was relieved even though he was convinced she would say yes. He lifted the ring from her palm and slipped it onto her ring finger, kissing her knuckle right after that before he moved to kiss her lips again. "I love you, Anissa."

-Two Years Later-

It was early in the morning when Zachary leaned over a white, wooden crib. Just two years ago he and Anissa had been married, and six months ago, Anissa had given birth to their first child, Victoria. She was tiny and already baby talking and scooting around on her belly. She would smile with her big blue eyes showing, although that color could change any day. Before going to work, he liked to visit with her just as she was waking up. He did this so Anissa could rest if she hadn't gotten any sleep the night before, and also, he just enjoyed seeing his little daughter before a long day in the ER.

He scooped her up out of the crib and cradled her in his arms, looking down at her as she cooed and yawned sleepily. He chuckled and touched her nose with his free hand.
"Are you hungry?" He smiled, "You look hungry."

Victoria just stared at him, her big eyes scanning his face. He took her from the room and into the kitchen where he began to prepare breakfast. Zachary was already dressed and didn't have to be work for another hour and a half, and the hospital was so close that he didn't have to leave early either. He'd be able to give Anissa a kiss and then be on his way.

Anissa shuffled out of the bedroom, and into the kitchen where soft cooing could be heard in response to Zachary humming off-key. This had been a morning routine for him, and Anissa was beginning to become afraid that their poor daughter would learn to sing off-key because of him. Still, the thought made her smile, and never once did she mention it. She heard the sizzling sounds of breakfast before the delicious smells even assaulted her nose. Mornings were definitely less quiet of late, and that made her very, very happy.

They had chosen to name their daughter Victoria, in honor of a friend so dear to Anissa, they often claimed to be sisters. She had died a few years back, and that was hard on everyone. Still, Anissa and Zachary finally married, yet Michael had only recently been accepting of the idea of dating again. He wasn't getting any younger, and they believed he really needed a lady. He'd already gotten a dog.

"Mika!" Anissa laughed when the German Shepard lightly pressed against her leg, making sure she take a specific route to the nearest chair, as she had been trained to do so if any of the furniture had been moved. The poor dog still had not grown accustomed to Victoria's baby chair. "Good morning, Zach! How is my sweetheart? She sounds rather content!"

"Good morning, she is very content today! I hope she'll be good for you while I'm gone... I always get nervous when you're alone here." Zachary turned around while things were still cooking so he could put Victoria in Anissa's arms, she looked like she was waiting to hold her and he didn't want to keep her to himself too much. "I already have some breakfast for her, so I'll feed her once this is done cooking." He said, "I went a little backwards this morning."

Victoria was constantly surprising Anissa with how heavy she felt. She could feel the multiple rolls on their baby girl, and that made Anissa smile. Baby rolls were the most adorable of rolls. "Backwards how?" She asked, giggling softly when Victoria began pulling at her long hair. She cuddled the baby tightly, unable to suppress a rather large grin. Mika laid down at her feet, beginning to snore softly. This was a day where Anissa wished she could see her daughter.

"Well I should have fed Victoria first and then cooked our breakfast, but I did it backwards... so now she's probably still hungry." Zachary brought some food over to the table and pushed the plate towards Anissa.

Meanwhile, at a cafe near the hospital, Abby Evans was waiting in a long line to get her morning coffee. She had accidentally become addicted to the stuff during school when she was making tons of designs during long evenings and early morning hours. It was unintentional, but she couldn't stop drinking it now. She even had her own usual, and the people who worked at this shop knew her well. Abby was a fashion designer for a popular clothing brand, making anything from tunics to dresses, she also had a line of jeans that she was in the process of producing, and that took up a great deal of her time lately. She tugged anxiously at her strawberry blond hair, leaning to the side to see the line wasn't moving, and that someone up front was arguing with the cashier.

She continued to twist her loosely curled locks and tried not to let the anxiety overwhelm her, as she was already doing her nervous habit of hair twirling.

"I want to speak to the manager!" The man shouted, "Now!"

"The manager isn't here, I'm sorry." The small figure of a female cashier was shaking as the angered customer continued to throw a fit.

Abby was debating on leaving when someone came to stand in line behind her, a man who was wearing a white lab coat and appeared to be somewhat taller than herself. She glanced back at him, always curious of looks. She studied his shirt, his pants, and his shoes... he was dressed very professionally. Then she tried to look at his face without making eye contact, his eyes immediately stunned her and she couldn't help but notice how distinguished he seemed, definitely in the medical career by the looks of it. She grinned and averted her eyes before he could notice her gaze. Finally, the line began to move and she gasped when she hadn't noticed and the man behind her must not have really noticed her either, bumping into her back.

"O-Oh!" Michael stepped back quickly, placing a hand on either of the woman's shoulder to steady her. The last thing he wanted was to knock her over. "I'm sorry, I wasn't really paying attention." He glanced down at her just as she turned to look back at him. Their eyes met, and both of them seemed to have equal trouble looking away from the other. Well, it would likely always be difficult to look away when a pair of bright green eyes were staring right at you from the innocent face of a beautiful young woman. He felt his ears heat up, and he ripped his hands away in fear of being thought of as creepy. That was the last thing he wanted. He cleared his throat a little, and finally averted his eyes as his neck began to feel as hot as his ears.

He needed to say something, but he wasn't exactly sure what to say. That made it difficult. He knew that he needed to... but suddenly, all of his conversation ideas sounded really stupid. Finally, he just settled on a somewhat awkward smile. The him since Victoria had died was quite different from the him now.

"That's okay, I wasn't paying attention either!" Abby giggled, able to see that he was feeling a little shy and that was absolutely adorable. She smiled at him in return and reached out a hand to shake his, "My name is Abby Evans!" She had noticed that he seemed really polite, so she didn't hesitate to introduce herself to make the situation feel less awkward. She backed up as the line continued to move so that he could also move forward, it was a busy morning and everyone wanted their coffee.

"Ah," Michael quickly took her hand, giving it a firm shake. "Do-" He paused a moment, "Michael Greene." He'd nearly introduced himself as Doctor Michael Greene, but she wasn't a patient... so his prefix didn't matter. Still, he was having trouble with conversation. Anissa would be disappointed in me if I didn't attempt conversation with this girl. But... what should I say? Compliments are creepy... and so are random questions at times. Actually, most anything is creepy. He really wished he could keep a mini-Anissa with him to whisper topic ideas in his ear. Even a mini Zachary would be helpful. He realized then that talking to patients was totally different than talking to people on the street. Or in this case, a beautiful woman in a coffee shop. Ah, that was it!

"Are you not really a morning person either?" He chuckled some, referring to the fact that they both were in line for coffee that morning.

"It's nice to meet you, and not really. I pull a lot of hours and end up not sleeping very well, so I am an avid coffee consumer." Abby gave a lighthearted giggle, "But if I don't get an early start, I don't get anything done on time and I'm in the process of producing some jeans... so it's a tiresome business some days." She turned around when it was her turn and ordered her drink. "Want to sit with me?" She asked, waiting for them to get her drink ready.

Michael nodded quickly, barely even thinking before answering. "Y-Yes!" He quickly ordered the frappe that Victoria had gotten him addicted to when she'd suggested he try it at some point. Once he'd ordered, he followed her to a little table by one of the many windows, and sat down, finding it to be the first time he'd actually taken the time to sit down in the little shop. "So... you are producing jeans? Ah... what exactly do you mean by that?" He asked, listening also for his name to be called.

"Oh! Sorry, I was vague, I'm a clothing designer!" Abby grinned, "I was a fashion major, so this is what I do for a living now... I stay up all night and work on... pants." She shrugged a little bit as if it wasn't a very big deal. "What do you do? You look like you're in the medical career, but lab coats can mean anything, right? I've even seen people who work for fragrance wear lab coats... sorry, I'm rambling!"

Michael chuckled; she was cute, and it seemed that she loved to talk. "Ah, yes. I'm a doctor of oncology." He shook his head upon realizing that she might not recognize the term 'oncology' and smiled. "Ah, I'm a cancer doctor. It isn't the most beautiful of career choices, but I can't say that it hasn't been the best choice I've ever made. I really love my job... however painful it can be."

Abby immediately noticed how his eyes somewhat glazed over when he mentioned how painful it could be. "I'm so sorry to hear that... but I'm sure you are a great doctor! I can already tell just by looking at you that you seem to be really gentle and understanding." She folded her hands over each other on the table and leaned forward, wondering if she was creeping him out. Not many people were as open and social as she was. "Is it too personal to ask about your career choice?"

"You mean... why I chose it?" He smiled a little; his pain associated with that topic had long since dissipated. "I had a close friend in high school who died of Leukemia. After she died, I decided I wanted to help make sure no one else had to experience that kind of loss. I can't save all of them... but I do my best. I just wish it were always enough." Victoria flashed through his mind. He had never blamed himself for her death, but he often wished there had been more he could have done to prevent it.

Such thoughts were much less frequent of late now. He'd not forgotten her, but the pain of her death was lessened with each day. Loving someone else didn't seem do difficult anymore. Just the year before he'd managed to stop wearing their wedding bands. He didn't get rid of them, but had hung them on a necklace and placed them in a picture box of hers that Zachary had given him. It came from Anissa's old apartment.

"A-Anyway," He rubbed his nose a little, trying to resist the urge to dig up one nostril to satisfy the extreme itch he had. "My work always sounds really depressing, and it's probably not something that will start your morning off too well, so-" He paused when he heard their names called. "Ah, I-I'll get those! You just wait here!" He got up quickly to go retrieve their drinks, kicking himself for possibly talking about really depressing things so early in the morning.

Abby still smiled however, touched by the story he'd just told her. When she began to think about it, her career choice did not seem nearly as noble. Yes she often donated to charities and such, but then it also seemed that her choice didn't help people as much. Not everyone was likely to go out and buy an expensive pair of jeans... so it seemed ridiculous. She watched as he was walking back towards their table with the drinks in hand.
"You sound very noble." She commented to him, "You must be really brave!"

Michael set her coffee in front of her with some little creamers and packets of sugar, not forgetting the stir straw. He wasn't exactly sure what she put in her coffee, so he'd brought a bit of everything. "Ah..." He smiled at the bit of flattery. "Wh-Why would you say that?" His neck and ears burned hot at the admiring smile she was giving him. It was a beautiful smile, and he couldn't help but feel a little proud that it was meant for him.

"Well, to be honest, I've only ever really just donated to charities, I don't feel like my profession has such a noble cause. Although you've inspired me a little bit, maybe there is something more I can do to help!" Abby said, putting all the little creamers into her coffee, it seemed that she didn't like it dark at all. "What do you think I could do to help out? I mean... I just feel like I'd like to do something."

"Hmm... well, I know a lot of my patients complain about being cold. They tend to lose a lot of weight because they're nauseous a lot of the time... so they like warm clothes, but it's often difficult for them to afford to buy new clothing on top of medical expenses. The women especially prefer hat stuff. I'm afraid I don't know too much about fashion, so I wouldn't know what all exactly that they like, but... yeah. Warm clothes... they'd like that. The hospital is really cold, so I like to keep Hot Hands with me." He pulled a packet out of his lab coat and slid it across the table to her. The instructions were on the back.

"That's good to know, I can work on something for them... maybe that would help a little. I just started to think how silly my profession is, that I'm not really doing anything for anyone. I guess if it's possible to make a difference, I really should." Abby said, reaching out to look at the instructions on the hot hands packet. She smiled and pushed them back towards him, "That's really cool, I've never heard of these before."